Another month down.

I didn’t post much, because there wasn’t much to say. In the last week though, I have moved into my bedroom completely. I still have one or two things to get settled, but I am in my room with the AC.
The coffee corner looks great, I even got some art which goes with the aqua up above it. I finally took all of Larry’s shoes and clothes out of the closet, his closet is now mine. I left his dress uniform shoes in the shoe drawer, but at the back. His dresser, with 11 drawers, now holds mostly my stuff. I moved his junk drawer down, and his funeral drawer to the bottom.
Mrs. Bucky the skeleton came upstairs, I dressed them in Larry’s black leather jeans, the shirt he wore when we got married, cowboy boots, Harley belt, and big black hat. Now Named Lucky Barry, and stands in the living room.

I have my Loki altar set up, with a candle offering bowl, incense, trinkets and a great Loki figure. Gives me a place to talk and meditate. Plus I get a shot of liquor each evening.

I got out the weed whacker and am learning how to use it. The tree guys did come, the wood is gone. I have done weeding in spurts in the morning when it is cool. Still need to find someone to fix the front sprinklers. The swamp cooler guy is scheduled for Monday, it is 90 degrees in the kitchen and hall. If I can cool those, and the front room, I can work on cleaning, and on art. The basement ceiling should be finished on Tuesday. Still waiting for people to come pick up other things, but I know how that goes.

While I am still very sad most of the time, and cry at least once a day, am still lonely as hell, and quite bored; I feel as if I have turned a corner. Maybe optimism, maybe a calm place inside. Still very up and down. Spending too much money. But somehow, I feel like I have a tiny measure of hope that everything will be okay.


Newsflash: Still tired

Nothing changes, it seems. The wood is still piled in the backyard. everything from my bedroom is either in the basement or in the pod in the driveway. The attic is insulated now, the bedroom mostly painted, and the wall in the basement painted. I found the other place water came down, in the truncated hall, onto the plastic Christmas bins. I can’t get to the tea chest to check it. I did lose my Lennox Joy bath mat, all covered in mildew spots. All the rugs were in a roll together, the cheap ones have been machine washed, but I think the fancy expensive one which cannot be replaced is covered in mildew spots. Well hell.
The power outage took out my programmable coffee pot. I got reimbursed for it, ordered a copper colored Cuisinart. Built a whole new coffee corner in anticipation. Turquoise trays, tea tins, a glass spoon rest, titanium flower teaspoons, put my fiber and stevia in glass canisters. Beautiful . Just got a notice that my package was probably lost, had to ask for a refund. The good news is the retro aqua coffee maker I wanted is back in stock. Sigh.

I am always tired though. I do not sleep properly, or I do the cat thing and doze too often. A little gardening gets done, but I am not up to much. I do paint a bit, which is relaxing. The Gospel according to Loki is catching my interest, I read one or two very short chapters daily. I sleep to Sacre Bleu on Audible, just cannot stay awake through the story. Any story would do it. I am not using my Kindle enough, or reading my comics. I let a couple of my streaming subscriptions go for now. Keeping Netflix, Amazon Prime, Disney (free for now), and of course Xfinity//Comcast. It is sufficient.

Desi and I went for a massage, first one since February. Every person wears a mask the entire time, even during the massage. Good distancing, and the appointments are staggered. Very, very clean. My therapist’s partner is compromised, so she takes every precaution. That makes me feel okay. Still some risk, but not a ton.

I miss flowers in my front pots. Michael’s has them on sale, so I got a bunch of bunches to put in my blue pots out front. Tacky, I know, but better than just dirt and dead weeds.

So Tired

The wind damage was covered after all. Rocky Mountain even sent tree guys. Sure, I have logs cut and stacked in inconvenient places, but they’re done. New breaker box in a new location, all up to code. Very fancy. I lost dome chilled and frozen food, but not too bad.

However, it all caught up to me. I am physically exhausted, just drained. I didn’t dress until later in the morning, now it is three in the afternoon and I already took an epsom salt bath and crawled back into my nightshift. Time to siesta.

Can We Just Not?

So,I spilled coffee and now my touchpad seems to have vanished off the laptop. May need a new one, unsure. Accidentally ordered four mouse, mouses? Mice? Cheap ones at least.

The front water sprinkler system master valve I paid so much to have fixed leaked the first time I turned everything on. Nobody likes to fix these things, so I have to figure it out.

Most of my seeds I planted have not germinated.

The garage gutters are full of maple seeds.

Waiting to hear from the insurance company about the next stage of home restoration.

I got a small dead branch off the power line about the patio. All proud of myself. This evening I hear a BOOM! A quarter of the maple split off and fell northward, onto Javier’s fence. Took out their power line. Mine is still connected, but ripped the meter off the house. Not covered by homeowners, because it didn’t hit a car or structure. Wind damage tends to be minimal or non-existent.

I am locked out of my online banking.

So, how is your fucking week?

Groundhog Blog

Rinse and repeat from the last blog. Doing this and that chore, hip gets better then worse, Lolo pees on me. House is still in pieces, demo signed off, waiting to hear from the restoration side. Haven’t done much outside, the tree on the fenceline is down and That Stupid Dog stands on the stump, paws on the fence, growling at me. She could be over in a flash, it is unnerving and I am not up for being terrorized.

Hot upstairs. I have fans going, but no swamp cooler or AC. There’s a pedestal fan in the basement, but it is noisy and bulky. I should have a new tower fan here tomorrow, for the bedroom. It is cool down here, but stuffy.

I went through a lot of Dad’s old Navy stuff, what is in the drawer, not the big bin. Found a patch and added it to his shadowbox. Posted a picture of the box on Reddit, got a good response.

All the news on TV is bad. I do not feel well this afternoon, queasy, warm, and in pain. I should have washed my hair, but no energy for that. I need to pack up house hippos to go to their new homes.

I just miss Larry a hell of a lot today. A lot a lot. I do not want this. Please, let’s rewind to better days.

Just another day

Whenever I get a little housework done, I feel a little better. I have been making art, got the kitty boxes done, the trash out, washed some dishes. Unpacked my go bag I put together after the earthquake, which meant I found the socks and t-shirts I was wondering about. Oops. Listed a handful of items on the local online yardsale. Tidied a little, swept a little. Got mom’s glass strawberry back up into the kitchen cubby. I need to do garden things, but am unmotivated to go out. Getting there.

The bedroom is scraped and the fans are running. The basement is dry, but torn and part and dirty. The attic is the attic, needs insulation. Waiting for them to call to come by and do the wetness checks.

Sleeping too much. The dreams are good though.

Hip is improving, but once the prednisone is done, we shall see how I feel. Lolo hasn’t peed on me in two days, so there’s that.

My Hermit Cave

So, the extreme pain in my hip is bursitis. Doc has me on steroids and rubbing that gel into my joints. There is some improvement, but I can tell this will be a long haul.

Living in the basement now; Desi helped tidy up the guest room, and I got some done myself. A little bed, a tiny night table, and I brought down Larry’s urn, my Japanese vanity, some art, and my Lokis. Oh, and things like clothes, toothbrush and lotions. It is quiet and dark.

The work progresses. The bedroom ceiling and walls were not drying, so the paint had to be scraped off in huge swatches. Lucy hid under the bed and got semi-sealed in with the fans and dehumidifier. We left the zipper in the plastic barrier open a little, and she eventually came out, but she was freaked. Insurance covers the work because the water line to the swamp cooler froze and split. The guy was right, it would have happened anyway, but I think it would not have been as bad if he hadn’t left the water and the pump going when he left for the evening. I had to block him on Facebook, and his number. He even went as far to text me from another phone! Leave me alone means leave me alone.

I have a nice sitting area out by the back door, restful, except I can stare at the weeds too long. Am contemplating some nice metal wall art for that area too. Why not?

Screen time is up, which means my extreme dry eye is ramping up too. It doesn’t warn me while I am actually using it, oh no, my eye acts up while I am sleeping. Wakes me up, as it is extremely painful. Even the deluxe moisture drops do not ease it completely. As cliche as it sounds, yes, it feels like being poked with a stick in the eye. Ugh. So what am I doing? Wearing my reading glasses and using the not painful eye to post this. My eye patches are taped up inside the bedroom…

May I say, April got away?

Straight up, I am having a bad day. Week. Month. Whatever this is.

Old news, I do not have COVID, my grand nephew did not. Rather he had two terrible infections, ear and sinus. A good diagnosis and proper medications took care of that. Other old news, cancelled the trip to Boston. Got the garden going, in progress. Learned how to order food from Instacart, my nieces helped, and I did go to the commissary once. DoD regulations, everyone had a mask.

And then things went to hell. Guy came out to do the swamp cooler. He left, but left the water on. Was it a bad pipe or did he do something wring? Not a clue. But water built up in the attic and poured through the interior walls into my basement family room. I was able to get the water off, but oh, the damage is done. Then the guy told me not to drag his name through the mud, which I had not done. He flat out refused to listen or to take any responsibility. Blamed the pipes, blamed Matt who did the winterizing, blame blame blame but not him. I had to block him on FB, and then his phone number because he jumped to texts about how I was being awful to him. Dude, you just flooded my house.

Now it is inspectors and damage mitigation, repair and restoration. One man wore a mask, but only over his mouth. One, not at all. I now have a sign, no mask, no entrance. Holes and water dimples in my bedroom ceiling. Stuff everywhere. Double recliner is soaked, not that I was using it, but I had the option. Rugs are trash. Friends did come over and do the heavy lifting, I am so thankful I have good people in my life.

Right now I am making sure some of my really nice stuff is moving into loving hands. I have way too much crap.

The neighbor took down the tree on the fence line, half dead thing, but wiped out an owl nest, all the eggs smashed. So that’s sad too.

And then two personal attacks in one day online. That hurts. Hurts too much.

Frell me, I just want a hug.

Marching On

And here we are in the second half of March.
I went to LA for the Peter Wingfield friendship convention, stayed at the Marriott LAX. I had a very good time, meeting Peter and Jim and David was delightful. Spent too much money. Undoubtedly exposed to coronavirus.

Been isolating at home, do not feel well at all. Minimal symptoms, but a lot of fatigue and headaches, warm spells but not quite fevers, a little wheezy, dry cough. My grand nephew in NY has it but cannot be tested. Desi took me shopping right when I returned, hope I am not actually infect and did not infect her. We shall see.

I have had groceries delivered, and ordered coffee and mac nuts from Hawaii. Hopefully the packages were not infected.

I may have gotten myself kicked off Navyformoms. I may need to cancel my trip in May.

We had an earthquake, a 5.7, epicenter Magna. Pretty good shaker for this location. My friends are freaked out.

How’s your apocalypse going?

Again, the Small Things

Hey, I got my hair cut after nearly three years. Last time I can remember was when Nancy trimmed it in the parking lot of Area 51. That was in the summer of 2017. Still down to my collarbones, but looks a lot spiffier.

I cleaned the coffee maker. It had gotten gunked up and was dripping slowly. A little vinegar and elbow grease did wonders. The heating plate is getting weird, so it will need to be replaced eventually. The retro models on Amazon look pretty sharp, and the reviews are passable. I decided to clean my toaster too. That did not go so well. The sticky grunk on the sides doesn’t want to clean off even with magic erasers. I am treating myself to a nice retro model in mint green It will look fantastic next to my Jadeite glass.

The toilet paper drawer needed restocking. The center partitions are sprung, so I pulled everything out. I packed up the electric toothbrush, tossed the baby wipes, and put the curling iron n the box to go to the thrift shop. Found the extra towel bar. I might install it. Why not? The question is where… it is a very small bathroom.

I cooked the pack of bacon which had been in the deep freezer. Larry and I got it with intent to cook it and take it to Burning Man. Well. Best By date on the package was 21 Jan 2017. Three year old bacon, still tasty. Still, wow.

I have fudge makings, and sweet potato snack cake, I do not want to look at those dates.

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